Would you know you lived in the Empire?

Imagine for a minute you’re a citizen of the Star Wars galaxy. Let’s say you live on Naboo. Beautiful, peaceful. When you were a baby, your home was invaded but you don’t remember that. A war was fought across the galaxy when you were a kid but now there is peace. You’ve lived a comfortable life.

There are rumors about horrendous things occurring on other planets. Stories about atrocities committed by the fine soldiers of the Empire. Entire species being forced into slavery.

But out your window, you see bright skies and singing birds. Your people and the Gungans get along just fine. Sure, there aren’t many Gungans in the government, and there’s never been a Gungan elected to any top offices. But there was a Gungan representative to the Senate once. And the senate is full of aliens. Which was why they can never get anything done.

You stay up to date on galactic affairs by watching the Imperial News. It’s the Emperor’s preferred news source. You’ve glanced at the Alderaanian Times some but don’t give it much credence. They’re always publishing stories lamenting what happened to some poor alien.  And they always blame Humans. Where are the stories about Human oppression? How oppressed can the Wookiees really be? The PC crowd has made it so it’s always Happy Life Day now instead of Merry Festival of Lights.

All of it’s fake news. Emperor Palpatine says so. The fine soldiers of the Empire would never do anything atrocious.  Tarkin and Vader are both veterans of the Clone Wars and would never allow it.

Your liberal friends’ keep questioning the militaries budget. While it is rather large, greater than during the Clone Wars even, there are dirty Rebels out there who want to destroy your way of life. You can’t send your troops out to fight them without all the tools they’ll need. Plus, the newest project is called the “Death Star”. You can’t get more badass than that.

Yet your friends keep talking about this new upstart, Leia Organa. She goes on and on about how all the money could be better spent to help people, like providing universal healthcare and fighting climate change so more planets don’t end up like Tatooine. She also had the gall to say the Lasat were “genocided” and the Wookiees are in “concentration camps”. But she’s just a kid. What does she know? It’s disrespectful to throw around those words.

So you continue to support Palpatine. Afterall, he’s from Naboo. He understands you and how oppressed Humans really are. Besides, the claims your unpatriotic friends make are just ridiculous. Palpatine would never disband the senate. And the Death Star is just a cool name. It‘ll never be used to destroy a planet. That’s conspiracy theory nonsense right up there with those nutjobs who claim Palpatine started the Clone Wars and is secretly a Sith Lord.